Growing up Geek
By Niki Wyre
I can’t tell you the exact moment when I first became aware that I was an outsider or felt like an imposter among others, but it felt like that most of my life growing up. Bless me, I sure tried to reign in my insecurities and blend in with the herd, but that was not going to happen iany time during this lifetime. I never felt girly or right in my own skin. I was awkward, wanted to play with the boys, loved video games (obviously still do), got sick and injured a lot (early signs of my illnesses), and just constantly felt at odds with the world.
I find it funny sometimes when I see someone I knew from back then and they are like I didn’t remember you like this, or you were so quiet before. Obviously some signs were missed. Sure I didn’t have pink hair since birth and I was raised very strictly for half of my schooling (a story for another day), but I have always been geeky… weird definitely.
So I thought the best way to start of this new blog, as an insight to me, would be to really show you an insight flip book of some photos (yes even the most humiliating ones) that showed the true me growing up. So here goes…
Did you ever try to hide the geek only to itch and burn inside your costume? I sure did. Dresses? Hated those. Mom, why were you determined I would wear those? Lol
No I was more a “yay a globe” and dinosaur wearing sweatshirt girl. Math, science… well any academics were my thing.
Wait… I kind of want that dinosaur sweatshirt now. Can we please make this happen? (:
I always felt more comfortable hanging with the guys or being a tomboy. I was not prepared for puberty. Mother nature is not kind to some.
I was definitely awkward and had some awkward hair years. This was pre Frizz Eaze and flat irons everyone so be kind. No one in my family had curls and we moved to Florida. Yeah… I learned a valuable lesson this time. My hair straightened out from weight of it being so long so I cut it off, excited it was straight…. Instant unruly humid curl hair. Go me.
I am pretty sure I was listening to some Boyz II Men or Nirvana.. It went either way. Again that was my very stylish look. I had to send this one to my oldest nephew as I look eerily just like him in a wig here. lol
Oh the awkward hair years continue… It is so painful to look at. Yikes.
Finally starting to move up some years but yeah normal family day at our beach house. I am 100 percent sure that I thought this looked cool. FYI, it is totally not. lol
Ahhh.. cleaning up for picture day and feeling so uncomfortable in one of my Mom’s outfits. *Sigh*
This is me giving thank you speech after Florida Girls State at our local American Legion / Auxiliary branch. I would like to thank my Mom for lending me that outfit. (*dying inside right now*). Those shoulder pads…
Yes, this one required two pictures to immortalize the awkwardness. Lol I mean, braces and glasses were enough with the unruly locks. Let’s through on ugly print with monster shoulder pads. Sigh. Moving on.
So normally when you think 18th birthday parties you think ragers or all night things with your friends right? Me? Nah. I had an Elmo cake, which I smeared on my face, wore my hats like this, ribbons in my hair and all in Pizza Hut. Totally normal. 😉
Well that’s me through age 18 and when I won my independence in to the world to start growing in to who I am now. *cough 20 years later* It took me a long time to realize you don’t have to hide who you are inside, just let it out to shine. Celebrate your weird and just find your tribe that gets you.
Until next time.
<3 Niki Wyre
I love this post, and it’s so similar to my childhood years. It took me forever to realise that it was ok to be a giant geek and total fangirl, plus I definitely get the attempts to tame unruly hair, curly hair can be a nightmare, it’s taken me 27 years to find stuff that works haha. You’ve inspired me to do a similar post to this at some point, it’s great to read about people who were similar to me growing up, makes you realise you weren’t the only one 🙂 xx
The struggle was real. lol Thank you. I would love to read yours once done. 🙂
I loved browsing through your pictures. I feel like I know you much better by reading just one post ❤️
Oh thank you. 🙂
Oh thank you.😃
This is so relatable, even some of those photos are so relatable. Plus I think all of us had to live through some of the dreadful fashion! Whether it was because of our mothers or because that was ALL that was available. Seriously kids these days have no idea… 😛
It’s one of the reasons why I’m so glad that kids have the internet now. I was 14 when the internet first started popping up in people’s houses and even then it was rare to start with. It pretty much saved my life because without it I’d never have found people who understood me or became my lifelines when my depression started – back then we didn’t know that kids could even get depression and anxiety and it wasn’t until my early 20s that I even realised I was depressed and had been for that long. So posts like this might contain some embarassing stuff but they’re great because they help all of us relate and maybe they also help that little girl/boy (or even an older one!) recognise themselves in it and say ‘hey wait, that’s me’ and realise it’s ok to me different.